Have you ever felt like, “I am okay, when people around me are, okay?” When people share problems, do you immediately try to fix, save, or rescue them, in hopes of relieving their pain? Are you the go-to person everyone can count on? If you relate, you’re not alone, these are the people-pleasing anthems and something my friend Mark Groves and I both relate to and share in conversation on the new episode of the Awakened & Aligned podcast.
This idea of tending to everyone else’s needs, often before our own, is actually not selfless but self-betrayal, and often gets us into relationship dynamics that are unhealthy as we build up resentment and internal anger. As Mark and I discuss in the episode, this belief pattern of trying to people please stems from subconscious beliefs that if we can help others, we will be needed, and therefore not abandoned, or rejected, which sadly, creates a sense of false security.
Mark brings attention to how these patterns create codependent dynamics, and can stem from unmet childhood needs, such as neglect, rejection, emotional abuse, and abandonment. To have healthier relationships we must look at our relationship blueprint and learn how it informs our current relationships (spoiler alert: it’s often a pretty direct line) and easier than you think.
The reality is, that we’re programmed to seek out meaningful human connections, whether romantic, familial, or platonic. And yet, these important bonds are often at the core of our suffering. So why is it so difficult for many of us to have consistent healthy, stable relationships?
Why do some of us keep repeating relationship patterns that leave us feeling alone, misunderstood, or not respected?
And how come, if we have so much love to give, and share it with others, why do we find ourselves exhausted, not getting our needs met, feeling resentful, or stuck in unbalanced connections?
And the big question I keep asking myself…
What happens when you do find love, and share your needs and desires, only to feel invalidated and ignored? …then what?
The answers may surprise you!
Despite all of our differences, at our core, we all want the same thing. To be understood, seen, acknowledged, appreciated, and loved for who we are, as we are, and to give this same appreciation and love to those we care about. This is why I brought in my favorite human behavior specialist to the Awakened & Aligned Podcast, my friend, Mark Groves, the founder of Create the Love, @createthelove, a social media sensation with over 1 million followers, and the co-author of the new book, Liberated Love: Release Codependent Patterns and Create the Love You Desire, to talk how to be healthier in love and life. Mark Groves and his wife, Kylie Macbeth, wrote this much-needed new book to help us navigate our relationships and create healthier connections in all areas of our lives.
Whether you are single, ready to mingle, dating, divorced, engaged, married, separated, or obsessing about the one who got away…this transformational conversation will leave you inspired to create the love you deserve from a place of empowerment rather than fear and insecurities. Mark shares clear strategies to help you feel more balanced in life and love. Including signs, you may be in a codependent relationship.
In our conversation: Release codependent patterns and create the love you deserve; Mark gives us a clear path to step out of protection mode and into connection mode.
You’ll also discover:
- Your original blueprint and how it informs all your relationships
- Important steps we can take to end self-betrayal and self-abandonment
- Why people pleasers, empaths, and codependents need other people to feel okay and how to create a new sense of self-worth, one rooted in self-respect, loyalty deep compassion, and self-love
- How to create true intimacy and connect deeper to yourself and your loved ones
- Why we should develop emotional resilience and how to start today
- How to express your true self at every stage of the relationship and not fear being rejected or abandoned
- How to create safety in your own body and mind, free from fear-based conditioning
- Exercises to do and key questions to ask to calm your central nervous system and move through difficult conversations, experiences, and relationship challenges
- What liberated love is and is not and what lies ahead when you choose to love more openly and wholly
- Why choosing yourself is the most important part of any relationship dynamic
- A simple exercise to develop self-trust, and get your needs met, no matter what
- Why a dedication to the truth is the most important foundation for healthy, expansive love
- And more….
Whether you struggle to maintain the kinds of relationships you want or are facing a specific challenge with a spouse, partner, parent, sibling, child, friend, or colleague, Mark and I dive deep into codependency, how to break free, how to create more expansive love and get the love you deserve and desire.
ABOUT MARK GROVES AND CO-AUTHOR/WIFE KYLIE MCBEATH
Mark Groves is a Human Connection Specialist, founder of Create the Love, and host of the Mark Groves Podcast. Mark’s work bridges the academic and the human, inviting people to explore the good, the bad, the downright ugly, and the beautiful sides of connection.
Kylie McBeath, also known as @beingisbeautiful to her 130K Instagram followers, shares daily guidance and teachings on relationships, spirituality, and embodied liberation. She is also a Certified Health Coach.
CONNECT WITH MARK & KYLIE:
Website: createthelove.com + markgroves.com
Podcast: markgrovespodcast.com
Instagram: @createthelove & @beingisbeautiful
ABOUT THE BOOK:
Groves and McBeath’s work―through their Create the Love seminars, workbooks, and consultation programs―has educated a new generation of relationship seekers on the best ways to practice and cultivate love. In Liberated Love, you’ll explore your original relationship blueprint and learn how it informs your current relationships (spoiler alert: it’s often a pretty direct line), and discover how limitation can be the key to finding freedom and experiencing full, fully realized love with another person.
