Do you have a situation insecurity, health issue or addiction that is ruining your life?
If only you could just get rid of the extra weight
, the addiction or be free of the disease, than your life would be great.
You think when you are free of this problem than you will be happy. We all do this, we put our happiness into a situation outside of ourselves. Hoping that when we reach that goal, our life will finally be better.
The problem is perfect doesn’t exist. And happiness is not something we can achieve by reaching some goal; it has to happen on the inside first.
If you have a problem in your life that is taking over and consuming you then this weeks message can help.
I know firsthand about the power of self-sabotage and settling. I spent years in an unhealthy body, staying in a job I hated and staying in relationships that suffocated my soul.
It wasn’t until I looked at my situations clearly and saw I was giving power to my problems. And in putting so much energy into what wasn’t working I was creating more of what I didn’t want.
If you have a situation that feels unbearable, look deep into it and realize that the situation is just a byproduct of the true root cause.
For example when I was addicted to food and binge eating I was really just using food to mask my deep desire to be loved. The root cause for me was my belief that there was never enough and I always wanted more. So no matter what, or how much food I ate, I was never satisfied. The goal is to learn how to be with yourself as yourself, with out identifying with the addiction, problem or situation.
Sending love to your situation is a healthy first step. I would send love to my body and look in the mirror, through my tears, self hate and shame, until I could say something nice about myself.
I felt like my addictions were bad and therefore I was a bad person. No matter what you are experiencing, the problem in your life is not you. When we can separate ourselves from the situation the shame, and guilt will diminish.
Try these powerful tools to help you release self hate, shame and guilt.
1. Invite Love in
When we fixate on our problems we feel like something is wrong with us. We identify with our disease, insecurity or problem but it blocks us from inviting love in. To break free from the guilt and shame, try to release resentment and fully surrender. This means reaching inward and turning to faith. Reach out to your higher power and ask for help. As you surrender fully you can invite more love in. Kindness will push out the dark emotions and you will feel supported and loved.
By focusing solely on the problem and thinking that your life can’t improve until that situation is removed from your life hinders your happiness. Instead of identifying with your problems, ask for help by praying, talking to your angel guide, calling a mentor, sponsor, or inviting you
2. Focus on Feeling Good
Instead of focusing on the things that aren’t working, or the habit you can’t seem to shake turn your attention to feeling good. The most important thing is how you feel. When you allow yourself to sit in shame and guilt you fester in the negativity. Pull yourself into a state of awareness by focusing on better feeling emotions. Ask yourself what can you do to feel better in the moment. It might mean going for a nature walk, journaling or taking a hot bath. Take care of yourself by loving yourself in each moment.
3. Play With The World
The next step is to turn your attention to what brings you joy. When we focus on what’s not working we give it power. Instead of allowing the negative aspects to rule your life focus on what brings you happiness and joy. Go play with the world, but doing what you love. Choose to follow your passion and let that pull you out of the insecure funks.
You matter and have a great purpose. Focus on the good and you will move past shame and guilt.
In the comments below, let me know how you plan to invite more love into your life?
Are you ready to turn off shame and guilt for good? Check out this Valentines Day Special:
This describes me to a T….however I don’t know how to invite love in right now. We
I am so stuck in my head…constantly thinking ,”what should I do?” I feel stuck in the situation…longing for peace and love and joy
This is a great article. It can be hard to find your way out of negative feelings like guilt and shame. But it is truly amazing how a few simple steps like these create a cascade of positive emotions that help turn things around. Thanks for the great tips!
My life is such a mess I don’t know how I can send love it . I tried to stay positive but that feeling in my heart , that anxiety can’t disappear no matter what !