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When I first started my business as a writer, life coach, and speaker, I struggled with feeling accepted by my friends and family. I felt like they didn’t understand or support Play With The World. It seemed as if they didn’t know this was a business and my future plan for my life. I felt so hurt when they didn’t show up for my workshops, or read my newsletter. I recall the night my very first public workshop when my dad said, “Are you sure you want to do this?” I felt like he energetically punched me in the gut. How could he ask such a crazy question? This is my heart and soul poured into this work. Yes, you bet, I want to teach people about happiness!
Today the support from my family has shifted. A few months ago, I spoke in front of fifty people at a Self-Love benefit I hosted, and my dad attended the lecture. It was the second lecture he attended in four years. Afterward he was blown away and said, “You are a excellent public speaker! You can help so many people with your message. I am so proud of you.” A big difference from the unsure him many years ago.
The reason I share this story is because in pursuit of happiness, many of us suffer because we don’t feel supported by others. I share in my new book Adventures for Your Soul, one of the biggest habits hindering our happiness is we think unsupportive people don’t care about our goals.
As I share in my new book Adventures for Your Soul, If you have a goal you are working on achieving, but you feel like those around you aren’t supporting you, it is a habit that prevents you from moving forward.
What I didn’t realize at the time was that my father was really just asking me what I was afraid to ask myself. Putting yourself out into the world is a scary thing. My subconscious kept saying, “Are you sure you want to do this? What if no one comes? What if this is a big mistake?” The lack of support I felt from my family and friends was really just a reflection of my lack of belief in myself. Starting a new business or working toward new goals takes courage, and most of the time we don’t really know if we can do it. We just have to go out and do what we feel is best.
So workshop after workshop, I put myself out there, and within time my confidence grew. And no surprise, so did the support around me. Today, my family is my biggest supporter, attending my group coaching sessions, sharing my messages on social media, and telling me how much they love what I am up to.
But it has to start with you. If you are in a position where you feel like those around you are not supporting you, the best thing to do is turn inward and asks yourself, “Do I believe in myself?” Often we seek validation from others when we lack the belief in ourselves.
Here are three easy action steps you can take to feel more supported now.
AWESOME ACTION 1: Get in Touch with Your Why
Do you have a goal or dream that you are working toward but feel like those around you are unsupportive? Get in touch with the why of your goal. Why did you set out to achieve this goal? Let the why drive your actions. It is about sharing your true self with the world and letting your passion guide you. Use that to emanate your why to the world. This will give you more support and success than focusing on why others aren’t supporting you. When you believe in yourself, you don’t need others to believe in you. The best support comes from within when you let your “Why” drive you.
AWESOME ACTION 2: Do It Now
Action out your goal! In order to get over the insecurities of starting something new, you must take action. What three things can you do today to work your dream into reality? Ask this every day. Always ask yourself, “What three things can I do today that my future self will hug me for?” Can you start a newsletter for your blog? Can you call a contact that a friend gave you to network? Can you hire a life coach or reach out to an author who has helped you? Can you pitch your article to the local newspaper?
Have fun playing with action steps. Not all of them reap results, but all of your actions together will reap tremendous results. The more you do, the more results you will see.
AWESOME ACTION 3: Laser Your Inner Light
A great way to stay focused on your goals is to connect with your inner light and laser it into everything you do. When you take action steps toward your goal, flood them with light. Literally imagine yourself full of love and light and connecting each action step to the highest good. The universe will always support your desires when you are aligned with your true, authentic connection. Flood your desires and dreams with light, and with every action step, conversation, or outward expression ground it in love and light.
These tips are from my new book Adventures for Your Soul, available August 25.
What action step will you take this week to get more support? I would love to hear in the comments.
Hey Shannon and Tucker, thanks so much for reminding me to not only support myself over my dreams, but to reach out to my amazing friends (furry and human)and clients who are awesome. Inspired by your message, starting today, this week I’m committing to spend two hours, five days a week to writing the first draft of my book and will flood each session with my inner light – mindmap and outline are already and waiting, but I’ve been procrastinating over starting writing. Thanks and hugs for the push into action. Can’t wait to read Adventures for your Soul.
Hi Shannon! Of course, you posted this video just when I needed it most. I was feeling very angry and unsupported by someone that I am working hard to help with an event. You helped remind me that I cannot change them, only myself. So I am being supportive of myself and just doing what I feel is the right thing. Can’t wait to meet you in NYC! Thank you!
Thank you for this!
I’m in the process of closing my little business and in hindsight I can see clearly that I lost passion for it because I had zero support and I wasn’t at a healthy enough place in my life where I was strong enough to be my own support. Thanks for this article, it helped me say goodbye to that tainted attempt and hello to my next life project 🙂